Time time time, see what's become of me

Hi everyone

Even at my tender age of nearly five months, I have come to learn that there are three types of people in the world:

1. Those who prefer the original folky rock Simon and Garfunkel version of Hazy Shade of Winter
2. Those who prefer the poppy rock Bangles version of Hazy Shade of Winter
3. Those who prefer the punky rock Bodyjar version of Hazy Shade of Winter

Me, I'm a number two. The Bangles rule and Susanna Hoffs is still hot. This is why I am currently addicted to sucking on plastic rings. They are bangle-like.

So, anyway, I went to Canberra last weekend. It was the first time I had left NSW. That felt good, 'cos really I am spiritually a Victorian. I like proper footy (that's AFL), rainy days and the blood that pumps through my little veins is 100% pure Vicco.

In Canberra, I caught up with Mel and Shaun and met their baby Henry, who is very ace. We've got plans to run amok when we're older, and can run.

I also met Tim, who dad used to work with. Tim and dad wandered around Kingston like a gay couple who adopted a baby. The bit were they both had one hand on the pram to push me along was very odd indeed.

I got to visit Old Parliament House and checked out the old House of Representatives and the Sentate. I swear I could still smell Bob Hawke. And then we went to the market, which was great fun.

On the way home, we stopped in at Scott, Anita and Owen's place in Goulburn and hung for a bit. Owen is the tallest four and a bit year old I've ever seen.

A big day, topped off only with me chucking a wobbly in the car. Well, it was boring. Seriously. When will mum and dad put a DVD player in the back so I can watch old AFL Grand Finals or the Best of the Bangles?

Below are some pics, cos that's what you're all here for. That's OK, I would be too.

Mum and I outside Old Parliament House. I really enjoyed the Prime Minister's Suite, very retro. Mum was off looking at the paintings in the National Portrait Gallery. No appreciation of history...

Dad and I about to head off into the Canberra morning. And man is Canberra a riot of activity early in the morning. We saw street cleaners, um, some rubbish, er, a car, and there was one business open - the newsagent, who was a bit startled when we walked in.

Mum and dad called this picture 'Boombah in the basin'. Bastards! It's puppy fat! I only weigh 7.5kgs, at least 30% of male babies are chubbier than me. Those fatties.

I am on a blanket that my great auntie Dot made for me. It's very grouse. 'My name is Harper' will probably be the second phrase I learn, right after 'Shhhh, go to sleep you little bugger'.

Could I be any more Victorian? Here I am, watching the Cats spank the Roos by 106 points. There is nothing more enjoyable than watching the team that beat my Hawks get flogged. Sans pants is compulsory, just ask my Uncle Tom.

And finally, me in the car on the way back from Canberra. Colourful cardigan? Check. Colourful beanie? Check. Colourful dogs to chew on? Check? Colourful language when mum and dad hit traffic on the M5? Oh yeah, that's a check.

Cheers
Harper

Entertaining

Hi again

Whoa! Two posts in one night! This follows two posts in one month! What is going on! Madness! And can I please stop using exclamation marks! They really are the last resort of bad writers!

Anyway, I have been busy. In the last few weeks, I have had to entertain Lisa, Mama and Papa and Jo. That's pretty hard work, although, I must be honest, it wasn't really at all.

It was my pleasure, although not as much of a pleasure as it was for them.

Here are some pics from that time, and a few crackers of just me being, well, me. Grouse that is.

I love mirrors. The baby in this one is HOTT. Wonder who he is?

I learnt this at band camp. Uncle Aaron is gonna teach me guitar. He learnt guitar so chicks would like him

Mama and Papa right before they jumped on the Indian Pacific to go to Perth. I can't wait till I go somewhere. Apparently we are off to Canberra soon. Mmmm

In the backyard with Gillian. Behind us is the birdfeeder Dad got for father's day. He needs help attracting the birds, according to mum. I didn't understand what she meant

I don't get fed enough, so I supplement my diet with coathangers. This one was very tasty

I spend a lot of time hanging off mum's hips. It's a happy place

Um, sorry about the drool all over your shoulder Jo. It's my calling card. And I only drool on those I really like

Dad taught me the words to the Hawthorn theme song. I fully expect to be singing it after the Grand Final when the Hawks smash the Cats. That would shut Auntie Alice and Uncle Tom right up...Go you Hawks!

Cheerio
Harper

APEC'ing around

Hi everyone

As you all know, Sydney hosted APEC. I thought "well, it's not very often you get the chance to see some of the world's most powerful and inspirational leaders, plus John Howard and George W Bush, all in one place. I should check this out." So I did.

Below are my amazing pics.

That's me hanging with Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper. Great name. And when I licked him, he tasted like maple syrup. Mmmmm.

And yes, I did meet New Zealand Prime Minister Helen Clarke. She didn't like it when I asked where her man-bag was.

I had the chance to speak to US President George W Bush. It didn't go so well - i realised at just four months old, I was way smarter than him.

And lastly, here is was happened when I met John Howard. Sorry Jeanette, I am sure that will come out with some Nappy San.

Ah, APEC - so much good will come out of it. I just hope the fuzz don't find this blog and censor my pics. They are pretty hard hitting and they have skin thinner than that Kiera Knightley chick.

Cheers Harper.

No news is...no news

hi everyone

You know, i get a bit of time to hang out and ponder. My favourite place to ponder is beneath my fishy mobile.


Those funny fish are, well, funny. I also like to ponder in my cot, propped up on some pillows while mum does housewife stuff.


Other days, I read classic literature and then ponder. 'My Farm Friends' is an cautionary tale of drug use, most obviously LSD, as creatures such as Peggy the Pig, Donald the Donkey, Cassie the Cow and Gladys the Goat are all very oddly coloured, almost paisley-like. It's a total farmyard freak out. It makes me ponder what life was like in the '70s, when drugs were cool, sex was safe and TV had only just become colour. Then I ponder the big questions, like is it only me who thinks fists are tasty? Will it stop raining here in Campsie? Will the E! channel ever play a new Girls of the Playboy Mansion or am I doomed to more repeats?

So much to think about. So much time.

Till next time
Harper

At least I looked good

Hi everyone

Last weekend I finally got to Henson Park to see the Jets play. Well, OK, I didn't actually see much of them actually playing, what with my inability to see things that far away and my crushing lack of interest due to the sub zero temperature winds.

Anyway, here's a few pics of what will always be remembered as my first Henno experience.

Oh, and Jets lost 16-19 to some Kiwi team. Boooooo.

Cheers
Harper

While Dad can look, I just couldn't. It wasn't a good Jets performance

Hanging out with mum after the game. Check out the beer gut behind me...

Uncle Svenny is drinking a coke 'cos he had a few cans the night before. It's OK though, Dad got a cold can of KB into him by the end of the game

A quiet post game drink in the car. Mmmm, warm milk on a freezing day

Handymen ahoy and a little buddy growing

Hello everyone

Auntie Alice and Uncle Greg were in town on the weekend. While Uncle Greggy showed dad how to fix shed doors, hang clotheslines and use a caulking gun, Auntie Alice and mum talked about how babies come out.

Which sounds kinda familiar.

Anyway, is that baby in there gonna be ace fun to play with down the track or what. If baby turns out as sporty as Auntie AND as handy with tools as Uncle, they are gonna be able to build goal posts then kick the Sherrin through from 50m on a tight angle. And that's just if it's a girl.

It was ace fun having Alice and Greg here, they were very keen to see how this baby thing worked. So i showed them - the random crying, the explosive poo in nappies, the inability to just go to sleep and the wide range of vomiting i have perfected. OK, i busted out some the big smiles and ace cuddles that i am famous for as well.

Of course, you all wanna see the pics. So without any further ado...

A cuddle with Alice

Greggy is funny. I mean, really, who would want to ride a BMW?

Auntie Alice is sooooooo Aussie she should be Aussie of the Year every year for ever

Uncle Greg learns that sometimes you can't fix a crying baby. Unless there is a socket set handy, then he probably could

Our guests, the one on the left is busy growing my cousin

Me, mum and dad outside our house. Where are my sunnies?

This is the authors 14th blog. He lives in Campsie with his mother, father, a fish called Peter Allen and a blue monkey called Monkey.

Rumours! None of them are true!

Hi

Now, apparently some of you seem to think that Dad writes this blog for me. You know, some sort of ghost writing deal, like I am the face of it all, but don't do the hard yards coming up with the written GOLD these posts contain.

Well, it's just not true. And here's proof - the below pic is of me knocking out the last blog, as well as an essay on classical architecture of 18th century Venice, an epic poem about the Battle of Midway and then, just to top it off, I wrote a instruction manual for mum, so she can learn how to turn off light switches.


Recently, I was visited by both sets of grand parents. It was a good time, I was rightly spoiled rotten and given gifts, cuddles and more cuddles.

So, now I have proven I write these blogs, sit back an enjoy pics of me with various older people.

Enjoy

Harper

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