My first Christmas and stuff

Merry Christmas family, friends and fans!

Yes, my first Christmas, and man was it cool. It was all about me. As you will see, many others thought so too.

I scored a boat-load of goodies, from toys to clothes to, er, toys. I will never be short of toys. And books. My fave toy so far has been a red steering wheel toy from Auntie Kara that has makes heaps of sounds. I know mum and dad really love it when I bash at it for ages. Or better, when I lie on it and it makes mad sounds without me having to do a thing. Mum and dad are looking forward to when Auntie Kara has kids, so they can buy them drums and cap guns.

Mum made some red cup cakes for my girlfriend Jasmine, as we went out to Cherrybrook to visit her and her parents, Linda and Chris. Red cup cakes are also for my brother Maxwell. I look a bit surly, cos I don't get to eat them.

Dad played cricket last weekend. Well, he sat for most of the day, went and batted for about six overs and made eight runs. Hardly worth the effort really.

I wasn't kidding before when I said Christmas was about me. Look, here's me climbing my mountain of presents. It was madness. A very sweet madness.

Then I lorded over mum and dad's Christmas lunch and demanded they entertain me. Here they sacrifice a cracker in my name to ensure it rains. Later, they peeled grapes for me while wearing togas then dad wrestled lions while mum plotted my downfall with co-conspiritors. Will every Christmas be so dramatic? And for the eagle-eyed, my sweet new swing is hanging off the tree.

My Christmas lunch consisted of chicken and broccoli. You can see the chicken here, not quite making it into my mouth...which is unusual.

I was so hungry later that I had to raid the bin looking for scraps. Mum totally sprung me. I think she has the bin alarmed. Sneaky woman.

As you can see, I am wasting away. NOT. I hope mum's kisses are sugar-free or I could be the size of the beached whale by Easter (which I have heard also involves lots of food. That sounds pretty ace as well).

So, next stop, New Years Eve. My first. And it should be a cracker, judging by the preview of the fireworks we had here in Campsie on Christmas Eve. Sydney Harbour? That's for losers. The cool kids hang in Campsie and let the locals go nuts with their hauls from Canberra. Ace.

I hope everyone's Christmas was as fun and crackers as mine, and mum and dads. And that 2008 brings us all lots of adventures and lotto wins. I want a toy Porsche!

Cheers
Harper

Road Trippin'

Hi fans

I've been on the road, hitting the hotspots like Gundagai, Shepparton, North Fitzroy, Thornbury, West Brunswick, East St Kilda, Broadford, Nagambie, Tocumwal and Albury. Pretty exciting stuff huh?

And of course, there are a stack of ace pics of my adventures.

I like an outdoor bath, nuding up in nature is beaut. This is in Shepp-mate.

Here's me meeting my brand new cousin Sidney. I look forward to getting into lots of trouble with him when we are older.

Mum and dad might find the camera interesting, but me, i prefer staring at beer. This is at The Retreat Hotel in Brunswick. Of course, many people came to see me. Some might have been for mum and dad as well, but i doubt it.

Are you lookin' at me? The bathroom sink at Geroge's place in North Fitzroy is just the just size for me to kick it back.

Bashing my dad with wrestling moves is a favourite pastime. Here I am trying to break his jaw so he has to eat pureed food like me.

The Retreat again, hanging with the ladies, such as George, Monica, Vicki, Lisa, Monica's bloke Ben (OK, he's not a lady) and mama. I am, as always, the centre of attention.

The backyard in Shepp-mate was a freaky place. One minute, there was mama, next minute, there was two mamas. Madness!

And no trip to Shepp-mate would be complete without a trip to the Kenwood Cow outside the Aussie. Check out the massive horn between my legs! Can you believe my mum picked this photo?

Cheers
Harper

Tired of toeing the, er, toe

Hi fans

An omnibus of me goodness today...

I have this feeling, got bit of an inlking, mum and dad are planning something. I don't know exactly what, but I have heard the words 'car', 'Shepp-mate', 'Melbourne', 'Auntie Alice', 'Fonz', 'Auntie Kara', 'a cast of millions', 'Tocumwal' and 'Albury' a fair bit recently.

Hmmm, that has nothing to do with the below photos, one of which is destined to be revisited at my 21st.

You will pick it when you see it. Mum and dad are still giggling about it.

Mum likes to model out-of-date Olympus digital cameras. She's a bit crazy when she hasn't been sleeping.

I think dad likes The Very Hungry Catapiller more than me. I prefer M is for Metal. And what is going on with dad trying to look like Chopper? Except for the ears of course...

Check out my totally ace sheets. Are they cool or what? For some reason, I dream of M & Ms.

So, the story goes, my mate Nikko here says "I'll bet you $20 you can't suck my toe." And I'm like "you're on buddy." So I do, and mum has the camera...

It was funny though. Nikko is sad cos he owes me $20. Cough it up pal or next time I bite.

One afternoon, this crazy man turns up at Campsie-Upon-Cook on a crazy lookin' motorbike. I had a sit on it, and can now say I have drooled on this very expensive two-wheeled speed machine. When the bike was reviewed on Alpha, it said this bike made babies cry. I say 'prove it crazy man'.

Sculptures by the Sea is more than just a few arty things chucked up along wanky Eastern suburban beaches, it's a chance for dad to get arty and take pics of me and mum in mirrors.

And it is tiring, being carried about in a pouch, looking at all the other babies, held captive in their stupid expensive Bugaboos.

So there you go. Until next time...

Harper

Won't you take me to....Melbourne town

Hi there

I've been to Melbourne and what a brilliant time I had catching up with all my fans from down south.

Not only did I hang out with Auntie Alice and Uncle Greggy, I saw Auntie Kara, Debs, Bille the poodle, Lusty Lisa, mama and papa and many more.

Can't wait to come down again real soon...like in about two weeks.

Seeing Uncle Tommy isn't around to get pants-off in the backyard, I thought I should

Lunching with Auntie Kara was a very emotional experience

This is a nicer one of me and Auntie Kara. We're just chillin'

Lisa has very tasty digits. I recommend her right index finger. It would get two hats in my book of finger reviews

Debs! She just couldn't get enough of my allegedly chubby feet and chubby hands. I'm not chubby, I'm festively plump

Uncle Greg is very good around the house. He installed a bean bag on Auntie Alice.

Then I met Bille, the wonder poodle. Did you know this dog can drive a car, use a computer and once landed an aircraft after the pilots were struck down with food poisoning? Well, that's what Deb's told me

Yay!

Cheers
Harper

Hi world

A bumper crop of ace pics of me for your enjoyment. I have been celebrating a bunch of firsts - my first roll, my first solid food, first nights in my my own room, first car trips now my car seat faces forward (finally, how boring is looking at the back windscreen!) and on it goes.

So, to the fun:

All good weekends start with cereal, papers and me standing on dad's groin.

Then it's out to the garden where Mum has hung some plants on the fence. She's pretty happy with her handy work.

Rolling over is my favourite past time, along side eating my fist and drooling as much as possible. Mmm, drool...

Hey! I'm not in this! And I don't remember this pic being taken. Someone is going to be sacked if it happens again. Anyway, this is dad and his new BBQ. He is such a white boy geek.

That's it, whoever loads these pics onto the blog is GONE. Although the Weber Q220 does look great loaded with steak, sausos, capsicum, mushrooms and asparagus. And I understand the food was tasty as well. Apparently my lack of teeth is why I didn't get any. Sure...

Now this is better. How cool am I in my heirloom highchair with my grouse bib on? I am about to eat solids for the first time and I was pretty damn happy about it.

Now, someone else is going to be sacked. I am NOT Elmer Fudd. It's important you know that I ate this, and it was yum.

Before i sign off, thanks to Debs for being the number one person for leaving comments. You rule.

Also, keep an eye out for a very special blog, one like you've never seen before. All will be revealed soon...

Cheers
Harper

And then....

Just cos you all can't get enough of me,

Here's a collection of pics that really sum up the last few weeks. They can speak for themselves, but I prefer to speak for them.

This is mum's mums group. Mum had them all over the other day for a tour of Campsie then lunch at ours. I got to chill with some homies my own size, which was fun. No one else had a beaut green nappy like mine though. Losers.

The mum's group settled in around the new outdoor furniture and talked about sleeping, feeding and pooing. They talked about us babies sometimes as well.
I met the famous Gibberace the other week. He was in Sydney to talk to some bloke about steam traction engines. Gibby started telling me about that, but I fell asleep.
Mum strikes a pose down near the mighty Cooks River. There is a long story as to why she needed a pic of me in the stroller with her, but you will have to buy next month's Cosmo Pregnancy magazine to hear about it.
My Auntie Alice made me this totally ace elephant. Here's me (in the clothes basket...again) trying to perform a trunkectomy. It's a tricky procedure to pull of when you are just five months old and have no veterinary training.

How cute am I? No, seriously, sometimes I look in the mirror and I am freaked out by how damn adorable I am. Puppies don't come near me 'cos they know they will look like old, fat, ugly footballs in my presence. And yes, I have discovered I have a tongue. New toy!

No, don't ring the child welfare agency - I am OK. It's just a shutter speed thing apparently. I was having a great time with mum on the bed, just laughing and playing. Although it does look like mum is going to eat me. She has mentioned before that I am delicious...I am a bit scared now. If I don't blog again in the next few weeks, come looking for me!

Cheers
Harper

We're a happy team at, er, Geelong

Hi all

AFL Grand Final day was a big one here. Mum's (supposed) team, Geelong, were in with their best chance to win a premiership in about 1000 years. Mum and dad's new outdoor furniture got its chance to shine, which is more than the new BBQ could do, seeing it's still on a boat somewhere between the US and here.

Anyway, I started my big day by relaxing on the bed. As you can see, I am looking mighty fine in blue and white. As for the pose, I draw my inspiration from Uncle Tom.

Later, I headed outside where Dan, Aaron, dad and Gillian were discussing the important things in life - footy, 80s TV shows and how to clean bat poo. Nice outdoor setting. And the TV got a rare outdoor trip.


Aaron was trying to convince me that Melbourne is the greatest place on earth. Yeah, if it's so great, why was I born in Sydney? Anyway, I will be down there soon to check it out for myself.

And there is always time to sit on mum's lap and just take in the sights.
Can't wait to watch the Hawks win next year.

Cheers
Harper

Time time time, see what's become of me

Hi everyone

Even at my tender age of nearly five months, I have come to learn that there are three types of people in the world:

1. Those who prefer the original folky rock Simon and Garfunkel version of Hazy Shade of Winter
2. Those who prefer the poppy rock Bangles version of Hazy Shade of Winter
3. Those who prefer the punky rock Bodyjar version of Hazy Shade of Winter

Me, I'm a number two. The Bangles rule and Susanna Hoffs is still hot. This is why I am currently addicted to sucking on plastic rings. They are bangle-like.

So, anyway, I went to Canberra last weekend. It was the first time I had left NSW. That felt good, 'cos really I am spiritually a Victorian. I like proper footy (that's AFL), rainy days and the blood that pumps through my little veins is 100% pure Vicco.

In Canberra, I caught up with Mel and Shaun and met their baby Henry, who is very ace. We've got plans to run amok when we're older, and can run.

I also met Tim, who dad used to work with. Tim and dad wandered around Kingston like a gay couple who adopted a baby. The bit were they both had one hand on the pram to push me along was very odd indeed.

I got to visit Old Parliament House and checked out the old House of Representatives and the Sentate. I swear I could still smell Bob Hawke. And then we went to the market, which was great fun.

On the way home, we stopped in at Scott, Anita and Owen's place in Goulburn and hung for a bit. Owen is the tallest four and a bit year old I've ever seen.

A big day, topped off only with me chucking a wobbly in the car. Well, it was boring. Seriously. When will mum and dad put a DVD player in the back so I can watch old AFL Grand Finals or the Best of the Bangles?

Below are some pics, cos that's what you're all here for. That's OK, I would be too.

Mum and I outside Old Parliament House. I really enjoyed the Prime Minister's Suite, very retro. Mum was off looking at the paintings in the National Portrait Gallery. No appreciation of history...

Dad and I about to head off into the Canberra morning. And man is Canberra a riot of activity early in the morning. We saw street cleaners, um, some rubbish, er, a car, and there was one business open - the newsagent, who was a bit startled when we walked in.

Mum and dad called this picture 'Boombah in the basin'. Bastards! It's puppy fat! I only weigh 7.5kgs, at least 30% of male babies are chubbier than me. Those fatties.

I am on a blanket that my great auntie Dot made for me. It's very grouse. 'My name is Harper' will probably be the second phrase I learn, right after 'Shhhh, go to sleep you little bugger'.

Could I be any more Victorian? Here I am, watching the Cats spank the Roos by 106 points. There is nothing more enjoyable than watching the team that beat my Hawks get flogged. Sans pants is compulsory, just ask my Uncle Tom.

And finally, me in the car on the way back from Canberra. Colourful cardigan? Check. Colourful beanie? Check. Colourful dogs to chew on? Check? Colourful language when mum and dad hit traffic on the M5? Oh yeah, that's a check.

Cheers
Harper