Mmmm, Melbourne, Max and memories...

Hiya

It's been a big few weeks in Harper-land, let me tell you. A trip to Melbourne and my brother's birthday kept me pretty busy.

First it was a long weekend in Melbourne. I got to hang with my little cousin Sidney, and Auntie Alice and Uncle Greg, and I also got to spend some time with Auntie Kara and Mama and Papa. I also met my great Grandma in some place called Ballarat where half of Papa's relatives seem to live. They all have dark hair and eyes like me...spooky.

Sidney hasn't worked out how to work the camera yet...but he will, after I give him a few lessons. I call this pose 'Young Summer', and it's a cracker. Sidney can't even turn left yet.

Sidney is also known as Lucky Cat. His arm just waves up and down, like a, er, lucky cat in Chinatown. There is a joke here about eating cats, but I am above that.

You know, when Auntie Alice read Where Is the Green Sheep?, it ended the same, with Green Sheep fast asleep. I should have picked it.

The Esposito vege garden is a place of wonder. Giant zucchinis, red tomatoes and some other stuff, like tasty dirt, which I was probably eating in this pic. Dad is wearing an apron Auntie Alive whipped up - it makes him look Tongan.

Here's me hanging with the old men in the kitchen, pretending to be interested in Old MacDonald and his farm. I mean, really, I was getting bored of Greg and his 'gun show'. The bit where he kisses them and says 'locked and loaded...baby' is kind of creepy don't you think?

On Max's birthday, we went to the zoo. At the zoo, there is an ace elephant exhibit, and mum took me up to the lookout to get a jumbo view. We had a beaut day, although I slept through the bird show, which apparently now has a condor and that is apparently very cool. I only heard that about a thousand times. And finally, my first cake. A red cup cake of course, for Max. Only seconds later, this cup cake was smashed into a thousand pieces all over my face. I think I even managed to eat some.

Ah, a huge couple of weeks. Some happy times, some sad times, but I guess that life in six words, isn't it?

Man, that was deep for a nine-month-old. Sorry about that.

Cheers
Harper

Hey swingers!

Hi everyone

It's true, I have teeth. A whole new world of biting has opened up before me. And I think I am drooling even more. I already have crawling down pat, as well as pulling myself up to standing on things, like chairs, cots and legs. Next I think I might juggle.

Oh, and if you're not cool man, and open minded, and into nature and its naturists, you might want to avert your eyes from some of the below pics, cos they are sizzling with me nuding up. I am one hot baby.

I got a postcard from Tommy and Lucy from New York. And mum got a new haircut. It's just all action round here. I can also hold post cards apparently.

Hey, Uncle Tom, this is me with ANOTHER box of BBQ Shapes. Jealous much? Huh? Yeah, suffer in your jocks.

I like to crawl around the backyard and eat strange things. My ace clam-shaped pool in the background wasn't to know it was only days away from me getting nude in it.

And here I am, nuding up in the great outdoors, in my ace clam-shaped pool, courtesy of Gillian. The chances of Gillian nuding up with me in my pool...about a gazillion to one. Her loss. The chances of Gillian walking into one of mum's pot plants...about three to one, especially if Star Of Ramen is around.

If you look real close, you can see my teeth. No really, on the bottom gum. I made mum and dad work hard for it though, it took two days to get this pic.

Have I mentioned how much I love my swing? It's just ace as. Grouse even...

... in fact, it's so ace, I just had to nude up in it. Cos nude swinging is just, so, Sydney. Oh yeah baby.

So that's another ace blog for you people. You'll be talking about this one for years. I can just see it, in 10 years time, you'll ask someone "where were you when Harper posted that blog with him nude in the swing?" and they'll probably say "um, in front of the computer".

Memorable.

Cheers
Harper

BBQ Shapes saved my life

Hi folks

Hey, it's 2008. What happened to 2007? It feels like I missed some of it. I mean, I don't even remember March or April.

So, below are a stack of, quite simply, ACE pictures. If they were a playing card, they'd be the Ace of Spades. That ace.

BBQ Shapes have saved mum and dad's life on many occasions. So I thought I should check them out. Mmmm, baked not fried goodness. And on this occasion, they also saved Aaron and Gillian's life as well. It was New Year's Day after all. I can't wait to be old enough to know what NYE is.

Moths. Fascinating things. No, I didn't eat it. Lucky for Mr Moth he was on the outside of the window or he would have been a tasty snack. And I think mum should wash the window, I may have drooled a bit on it.

Checking out the Sydney Festival just the other day. It was culture with a capital K. We had a look at some origami stuff, lots of paper cranes, some very big ones hanging from the trees. And I got to leave a message for Sydney of the future. Mine? "Less work, more play". Short and sweeeeeeeet.

My parents are cruel. They think this is funny.

Yes, I know, cute. Just damn cute. But these stripes really do make me look fatter than what I am. At least mum didn't put me in the oven.

Check out my hot sunglasses - thanks Uncle Tommy and Auntie Lucy.

Sometimes boob milk and vegemite toast just isn't enough, I need flesh. Living human flesh. Man I hope I get teeth soon cos gumming dad's finger got me nowhere.

I am not sure what is going on here. I am not sad, not happy, not doing poo, not trying to eat my feet or get into the bin. Just...not sure. So mum takes a pic. Thanks mum. That's beaut.

It's gonna be a big 2008, I predict I will get teeth, walk, turn one and have a party (May 1 - party at my place, you can come...ladies bring a cheese). I also predict I will watch plenty of footy, read Where Is The Green Sheep? quite a few times and get plenty more pics taken of me.

Of course.

I might even get to meet Uncle Tommy and Auntie Lucy in the flesh.

Rock.

Cheers
Harper

My first Christmas and stuff

Merry Christmas family, friends and fans!

Yes, my first Christmas, and man was it cool. It was all about me. As you will see, many others thought so too.

I scored a boat-load of goodies, from toys to clothes to, er, toys. I will never be short of toys. And books. My fave toy so far has been a red steering wheel toy from Auntie Kara that has makes heaps of sounds. I know mum and dad really love it when I bash at it for ages. Or better, when I lie on it and it makes mad sounds without me having to do a thing. Mum and dad are looking forward to when Auntie Kara has kids, so they can buy them drums and cap guns.

Mum made some red cup cakes for my girlfriend Jasmine, as we went out to Cherrybrook to visit her and her parents, Linda and Chris. Red cup cakes are also for my brother Maxwell. I look a bit surly, cos I don't get to eat them.

Dad played cricket last weekend. Well, he sat for most of the day, went and batted for about six overs and made eight runs. Hardly worth the effort really.

I wasn't kidding before when I said Christmas was about me. Look, here's me climbing my mountain of presents. It was madness. A very sweet madness.

Then I lorded over mum and dad's Christmas lunch and demanded they entertain me. Here they sacrifice a cracker in my name to ensure it rains. Later, they peeled grapes for me while wearing togas then dad wrestled lions while mum plotted my downfall with co-conspiritors. Will every Christmas be so dramatic? And for the eagle-eyed, my sweet new swing is hanging off the tree.

My Christmas lunch consisted of chicken and broccoli. You can see the chicken here, not quite making it into my mouth...which is unusual.

I was so hungry later that I had to raid the bin looking for scraps. Mum totally sprung me. I think she has the bin alarmed. Sneaky woman.

As you can see, I am wasting away. NOT. I hope mum's kisses are sugar-free or I could be the size of the beached whale by Easter (which I have heard also involves lots of food. That sounds pretty ace as well).

So, next stop, New Years Eve. My first. And it should be a cracker, judging by the preview of the fireworks we had here in Campsie on Christmas Eve. Sydney Harbour? That's for losers. The cool kids hang in Campsie and let the locals go nuts with their hauls from Canberra. Ace.

I hope everyone's Christmas was as fun and crackers as mine, and mum and dads. And that 2008 brings us all lots of adventures and lotto wins. I want a toy Porsche!

Cheers
Harper

Road Trippin'

Hi fans

I've been on the road, hitting the hotspots like Gundagai, Shepparton, North Fitzroy, Thornbury, West Brunswick, East St Kilda, Broadford, Nagambie, Tocumwal and Albury. Pretty exciting stuff huh?

And of course, there are a stack of ace pics of my adventures.

I like an outdoor bath, nuding up in nature is beaut. This is in Shepp-mate.

Here's me meeting my brand new cousin Sidney. I look forward to getting into lots of trouble with him when we are older.

Mum and dad might find the camera interesting, but me, i prefer staring at beer. This is at The Retreat Hotel in Brunswick. Of course, many people came to see me. Some might have been for mum and dad as well, but i doubt it.

Are you lookin' at me? The bathroom sink at Geroge's place in North Fitzroy is just the just size for me to kick it back.

Bashing my dad with wrestling moves is a favourite pastime. Here I am trying to break his jaw so he has to eat pureed food like me.

The Retreat again, hanging with the ladies, such as George, Monica, Vicki, Lisa, Monica's bloke Ben (OK, he's not a lady) and mama. I am, as always, the centre of attention.

The backyard in Shepp-mate was a freaky place. One minute, there was mama, next minute, there was two mamas. Madness!

And no trip to Shepp-mate would be complete without a trip to the Kenwood Cow outside the Aussie. Check out the massive horn between my legs! Can you believe my mum picked this photo?

Cheers
Harper

Tired of toeing the, er, toe

Hi fans

An omnibus of me goodness today...

I have this feeling, got bit of an inlking, mum and dad are planning something. I don't know exactly what, but I have heard the words 'car', 'Shepp-mate', 'Melbourne', 'Auntie Alice', 'Fonz', 'Auntie Kara', 'a cast of millions', 'Tocumwal' and 'Albury' a fair bit recently.

Hmmm, that has nothing to do with the below photos, one of which is destined to be revisited at my 21st.

You will pick it when you see it. Mum and dad are still giggling about it.

Mum likes to model out-of-date Olympus digital cameras. She's a bit crazy when she hasn't been sleeping.

I think dad likes The Very Hungry Catapiller more than me. I prefer M is for Metal. And what is going on with dad trying to look like Chopper? Except for the ears of course...

Check out my totally ace sheets. Are they cool or what? For some reason, I dream of M & Ms.

So, the story goes, my mate Nikko here says "I'll bet you $20 you can't suck my toe." And I'm like "you're on buddy." So I do, and mum has the camera...

It was funny though. Nikko is sad cos he owes me $20. Cough it up pal or next time I bite.

One afternoon, this crazy man turns up at Campsie-Upon-Cook on a crazy lookin' motorbike. I had a sit on it, and can now say I have drooled on this very expensive two-wheeled speed machine. When the bike was reviewed on Alpha, it said this bike made babies cry. I say 'prove it crazy man'.

Sculptures by the Sea is more than just a few arty things chucked up along wanky Eastern suburban beaches, it's a chance for dad to get arty and take pics of me and mum in mirrors.

And it is tiring, being carried about in a pouch, looking at all the other babies, held captive in their stupid expensive Bugaboos.

So there you go. Until next time...

Harper

Won't you take me to....Melbourne town

Hi there

I've been to Melbourne and what a brilliant time I had catching up with all my fans from down south.

Not only did I hang out with Auntie Alice and Uncle Greggy, I saw Auntie Kara, Debs, Bille the poodle, Lusty Lisa, mama and papa and many more.

Can't wait to come down again real soon...like in about two weeks.

Seeing Uncle Tommy isn't around to get pants-off in the backyard, I thought I should

Lunching with Auntie Kara was a very emotional experience

This is a nicer one of me and Auntie Kara. We're just chillin'

Lisa has very tasty digits. I recommend her right index finger. It would get two hats in my book of finger reviews

Debs! She just couldn't get enough of my allegedly chubby feet and chubby hands. I'm not chubby, I'm festively plump

Uncle Greg is very good around the house. He installed a bean bag on Auntie Alice.

Then I met Bille, the wonder poodle. Did you know this dog can drive a car, use a computer and once landed an aircraft after the pilots were struck down with food poisoning? Well, that's what Deb's told me

Yay!

Cheers
Harper